042211

I spilled my guts today.

what you swore the time before

I have been trying to find the words to write about how horrible of a week I have been having, but I keep erasing everything I write.  I guess I just don't want to talk about it anymore.

I will, however, say thank you to all of my friends and family who have been there for me this week.  You're all so amazing and I truly regret not spending as much time as possible with you for the past year.  

Also, I'd like to thank a specific person (I will keep her identity anonymous just so there is no more drama).  You have no idea how shocked I was to find out the truth from you.  I mean this in a good way.  I am still in awe and really don't know what to say except thank you from the bottom of my heart.  It makes me happy to know that there are some girls still out there that won't stab each other in the back.

So, onto other things, I have become part of the 21st century and bought an iPhone.  I'm addicted to it already and I've only had it for a day.  I already loaded some music onto it and currently have a playlist playing, featuring Depeche Mode, New Order, Dramarama, Butthole Surfers, Sparta, the Bouncing Souls, Saosin, etc.  A little mix of my teenage years to before I was even born.

Well, it's time to go out in the rain...See you next time.

dig in

I've always had kind of larger than life dreams.  Maybe not to the extent of running-for-president big, but I've always gotten this feeling in my tummy whenever someone instructed me to "create" something.  I'm a big dork.  Anyways, I've been brainstorming a lot about the eatery Eric and I wish to open.  I'm constantly thumbing through magazines for recipes that are either vegan or easily abled to veganize.  I've also decided that I want our core glassware to be handcrafted.  Certain mugs, bowls, dishes, etc. to be from shops on Etsy, or craft fairs.

I came across some featured artists today and I decided to post some of my favorite pieces:

creativeutility

tackledandshackled

cambrirae

guinea pigs

These are my two girls.  To the left is my new baby whom I just got today.  She has yet to be named.  It's difficult picking out names for pets.  To the right is Greta.  I adopted her about a week ago.  She's HUGE compared to the new guinea pig.  It's rather funny.  Greta is a little over a year old and kind of set in her ways.  She doesn't like being handled too much, which I'm trying to change.  I want to show her that I'm gentle and I don't want to hurt her.  The new guinea pig clings to me like a ghost is chasing her.  She's so tiny and probably only a few months old.  I wonder if she'll grow as big as Greta...

fresh starts

My name is Bean.

I'm a photographer & artist from Long Island.

There's nothing I like more than a fresh start & I do get bored easily.

I'll be 26 this year, and who I've been is not who I really am.  I'm trying this thing called "finding myself".  It's been a challenge, but I'm getting there.  

(Whoever said that as soon as you graduate high school you need to have the rest of your life figured out must had been one sad, lonely individual.)

I've been a psychology major for the past x-amount of years.  And for those said x-amount of years I have been miserable.  I am not an analyst.  Who am I to judge?  I'm not perfect; in fact, I think I'm a little crazy.  Or is it normal to think of yourself as crazy?

I discovered recently that I don't want to do anything in my life but create.  Whatever it may be, as long as it comes from my imagination and from my two hands.  

I've been practicing the art of photography since the age of 15.  I get embarrassed to call myself a "photographer" because being from Long Island, it's a dime-a-dozen hobby/profession.  It's come to the point where just by owning a camera, people consider themselves photographers.  You don't need to know the history.  You don't need to know the functions of your camera.  All you need is autofocus and Photoshop and you're good to go.  Have I mentioned yet that I am sarcastic 10% of the time, and a complete bitch 90% of the time?  Well in all honesty, I do take my work very seriously, but most of the stuff I will post here is either work I have manipulated or experimented with, or completely personal shots and candids of friends, family, myself and my surroundings.  I have a website to post most of my professional work, so why clutter my blog with that stuff?

So I have this 5 year plan with my good friend Eric.  We're both devout vegetarians and love to experiment with different foods.  Personally I love creating different dishes (healthy and fattening), and we realized we both have the same dream of opening a vegan restaurant here on Long Island.  So, I really hope everyone who may or may not read this will come by our joint once it's opened (whenever that may be) and experience what delicious vegan and vegetarian food tastes like...Even if you're not vegan or vegetarian.

Well, I guess I have rambled on for quite a bit, so this will be the end for now.